A loss isn’t just about losing in a video game or losing some money, it can be more. Every person experiences some kind of loss during their entire life. It is general human nature that when someone experiences a loss, they fall into the abyss of grief. But, Dr. Phil McGraw, a renowned psychologist, says that with the right planning and preparation, we can get over a loss gracefully and can maintain the balance of our lives. He says that no matter how bad the situation is, no matter how empty we feel, but in the end, we can recover and get back to our normal life.
He further suggested some ways that can help in recovering from a loss, these are:
1. Don’t Be Hard on Yourself, Be Patient
After a loss, the first thing we need to do is to accept what has happened. It is quite difficult for people to accept a loss, but it is certainly the first step towards recovery. There is no specific time to have emotions or get over them. We need to take an initiative towards the recovery and accept the loss or tragedy. Dr. Phil says that no matter how bad the situations are right now, but we can survive, and hope for a better future.
2. Don’t Raise Your Expectations
Feeling emotional and sad after a loss is normal. But, this it is not necessary that we are going to stay like this throughout our life. There will come a time when we’ll recover from all these emotions. But, you should not set your expectations while you are recovering. This is because recovery from some emotions isn’t easy, it takes time.
3. Accept the Irreversible Changes
One of the greatest struggle for a person after suffering from a loss is to accept the changes. This is quite hard for some people to accept these changes and keep up with their life. They feel various emotions, i.e., anger, fear, etc., and are not able to cope up with the changes in their life. Dr. Phil says that it is difficult to accept the changes, but we can’t be victimized by our loss. He says that everyone has a choice to how to react to a loss, and they must move towards accepting the changes and understand the things we can’t change. It is better to accept the changes or take some help from others who have experienced similar loss in their life. Conversation is the key to recover from mental traumas like loss.
4. Don’t Get Stuck
People often get stuck with a tragedy or loss such as getting stuck in the memory of some deceased loved one or having emotions after a divorce or the end of a long-term friendship. Dr. Phil advices to not to get stuck with any kind of emotions. Instead, he advices to move on and focus on something that diverts attention from sad memories. He further advices to attend counseling sessions, if needed.
5. Learn from the Experience
Dr. Phil advices to learn something from the experience, motivate yourself to do something better, and promise yourself to become a better person. Either we can get stuck with the bad memories or move on towards a better or even a great life.
6. Celebrate Life
Getting stuck to sad memory not only makes our life painful but also slows down the pace of life. Dr. Phil says that mourning over a loss is not bad but carrying the grieve with you throughout the life is injustice. He advises to move on celebrate life, move over the past and the deaths, and focus on the life right now. He advices to accept an attitude.